Let’s start with me saying that I identify as sexually fluid. Now that is not to say that I’d have sex with just anyone. For me, it means that there’s is no one characteristic that I find attractive in a group of people (ie: gender).
I find that I’m attracted to different people for drastically different reasons. The weirdest trait that I’ve been attracted to someone for was their knees. YES, I said knees.
How did I discover my sexuality?
At first I didn’t know I could be anything other than gay or straight so I just didn’t identify as anything. There was speculation around my sexuality all through out high school.
I confused so many people but they were always asking the wrong questions. People would ask if I was straight then they’d ask if I was a lesbian and of course both answers are no but that was the end of the sexuality spectrum for them.
Just to make it easy, they concluded that I was seen as a lesbian. It didn’t help that all throughout junior high and high school I shopped in the boys section.
For a while I identified as bisexual but even that didn’t feel like it fit. I knew that it wasn’t gender that determined how attracted to someone I was.
It wasn’t until I came across this gem call Tumblr that I learned of all the dozens of other sexualities there are. This opened my eyes to the wide spectrum of identities that didn’t meet the social norm and the possibility that there are others.
Even with the extensive list of sexualities I still didn’t feel like just one of them fit me. Gender wasn’t something that I considered when I determined whether I was attracted to someone.
It was usually something about them that stood out about them. It could be a physical feature, a personal trait, a laugh, or a knee (lol).
There was no event where I had an “aha” moment that helped me recognize my sexuality. It was more of a process of elimination. So here I am, in all of my sexually fluid glory.